Poisons & Placebos

Poisons & Placebos.
We’re not doctors. We’re not certified. We’re not even trying.
We’re just a small, over-caffeinated collective of herb-slinging skeptics bottling the ancient, the anecdotal, and the almost-illegal into little brown bags of chaos.

At Poisons & Placebos, we believe in the healing power of plants… allegedly.
We make absolutely no claims—because the FDA gets real fussy when your grandma’s tea starts outperforming lab-made side effects. So instead of pretending we know everything, we lean into the beautiful mess of not knowing. You won’t find miracle cures here. You’ll find centuries of folklore, sarcasm, stubborn rituals, and the occasional “may or may not do a damn thing.”

We’re the brand your aunt warned you about. The one the old wives whispered against over cauldrons and cast iron pots. We are what happens when history, sarcasm, and that one cousin who never followed directions come together and start packaging mugwort with disclaimers like:

“Used for centuries to increase dreams, creativity, and possibly hallucinations. Or maybe we just drank too much. Who knows.”

Our formulas? Raw.
Our herbs? Real.
Our tone? Petty and prophetic.
We laugh in the face of clinical trials—then dig through 3,000 years of herbal gossip to find what actually worked before insurance companies existed.

This is not your grandmother’s tea company.
Unless your grandmother was the village witch with unresolved issues and a strong brand identity.

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So what do we do?
We blend herbs. We spill tea. We mock old wives’ tales while secretly studying them.
We tell stories. We stay curious.
And sometimes…
We heal—but only if you believe in placebo. Or poison. Whichever gets the job done.

Poisons & Placebos.
Drink wisely. Or don’t. We’ll be here either way.